History Of Ailments

800 BC

Headaches and migraines have afflicted humans since the beginning of time, resulting in some quite bizarre – and often dangerous – cures as people desperately sought to relieve the pain in their heads.

As far back as the 8^th century BC, trephining (also called trepanning) was used to alleviate the pressure on the brain (while also causing irreversible damage and more other than not, killing the patient). This ancient technique involved putting a hole in the skull to release demons and evil spirits from the head, which were believed to be the cause of headaches as well as a range of other conditions such as epilepsy and mental illness.

This crude, rather barbaric headache cure was used periodically over the centuries, coming in and out of fashion but never really going away. It became popular again as recently as the 1600s, with physicians recommending it to some patients with very stubborn migraines.

Middle Ages

Headaches and migraines around this time were frequently linked to mystic visions. Sufferers recorded seeing visions of bright, brilliant stars with falling sparks and splendid clouds of light – which we now know to be the visual symptoms of a serious migraine attack.

European medieval treatments moved away from trying to get inside the patient’s head to more external remedies. Herbal mixtures were popular, usually containing various combinations of rose, lavender, sage, bay, barley, betony and vervain, which were boiled together and wrapped in a cloth, to be held against the sore head.

More strangely was the use of drug-soaked poultices or opium and vinegar solutions, which were also applied to the patient’s head in an attempt to cure headaches. Vinegar has the ability to open the pores of the skin and when mixed with opium’s pain-relieving properties would be absorbed more quickly through the scalp. In some more drastic cases, doctors even recommended applying a hot iron to the head to relieve symptoms.

1600-1800s

Enter the scientific era. The 17^th and 18^th century introduced the term “neurology” and brought about a greater understanding of migraines and headaches. The vascular theory of headache was popularised around this time, stating that migraines were caused by vasodilatation (the widening of blood vessels and a decrease of blood pressure). Supporters of the theory held that headache symptoms were related to slowly rising spasms that started at the peripheral ends of the nerves.

In response to this theory, centrifugation was proposed as a treatment towards the late 1700s, which involved spinning the patient around in a centrifuge to force the blood from their head to their feet.

Then, in the late 1800s, came the most influential textbook of neurology at the time, from renowned neurologist William Gowers. In it, Gowers emphasised the importance of a healthy diet in treating migraines as well as a treatment of his own invention which came to be known as the “Gowers mixture” – a solution of nitroglycerin, alcohol and other agents. He was also famed for advocating marijuana to relieve the effects of a migraine attack.

Ancient Era

Initially called “melancholia”, depression has always been one of the most common psychiatric disorders, and attempts at successful treatment have been a continuous struggle for healers, physicians and philosophers throughout history.

In Ancient China and Egypt, depression was seen as a spiritual illness rather than a physical or mental one. It was believed to be caused by evil spirits or demonic possession, and as such, patients were attended to by priests who used exorcism techniques like beatings, restraints and starvation to drive the demons out.

In contrast, in Ancient Greece and Rome, physicians believed that depression was both a biological and psychological disease and took a much more gentle approach to treating it. They recommended massages, exercise, special diets, music and baths as therapy, as well as purifying the body by sleeping in temples. A special concoction of poppy extract and donkey’s milk was also designed to help alleviate symptoms of depression.

Middle Ages

By the Middle Ages, religion – specifically Christianity – had dominated most other medical explanations of depression and mental illness. It was believed that depressed and mentally ill people were possessed by the devil, demons or witches and that their condition was contagious in that they could infect others with their madness.

Exorcisms were still commonly used, as well as some much crueller tactics such as drowning or burning. Some depressed patients were even tied up or locked away in “lunatic asylums” (which resembled inhumane prisons more than hospitals) to keep them from being a burden on their families and the community.

At the same time, on the other side of the world, Arabic medicine was proving to be much more progressive and humane. Fighting against superstition and mysticism, they attempted to cheer and encourage depressed patients with music, reading and sexual stimulation while administering alcohol, caffeine, cannabis and opium as antidepressants.

1800-1900s

As medicine and psychiatry continued to advance in the 19^th century, it was around this time that depression was first distinguished from schizophrenia and other forms of mental illness. In response, psychodynamic theory was established and psychoanalysis, the psychotherapy based on the theory, became an increasingly popular treatment for depression.

Founded by famed neurologist Sigmund Freud, psychoanalysis therapy (also referred to as the “talking cure”) attempted to cure melancholia by making conscious a person’s unconscious thoughts and motivations. The aim was to release repressed emotions and experiences to make a person aware of their unconscious conflicts, which Freud held was the primary cause of depression.

Many other doctors at the time still viewed depression as a physical disease and brain disorder, which they attempted to treat with radical methods like electroconvulsive therapy (passing electric currents through the brain to induce a seizure) and lobotomies (surgically removing a portion of the brain). These were extremely dangerous and often unsuccessful treatments, in many cases resulting in a coma or even death.

Ancient Times

Epilepsy has been recognised for thousands of years but it wasn’t always seen as a neurological condition.  Many ancient cultures, including the Egyptians, Hindus, Aztecs and Incas, all linked epilepsy to cranky gods.

The Babylonians were kind of on the same page – they believed it to be caused by the presence of demons.  They recognised that there were different kinds of epileptic seizures but thought the different clinical presentations were caused by different types of demons infecting the patient.

The Romans also bought in to the demon theory but they took it further and suggested that if a person breathed on or touched another human the demon would spread into their body unless the other person spit immediately. Makes sense, right? The Romans also trialed the use of blood from a murder victim, in particular, the blood of murdered gladiators.  Sometimes this treatment was supplemented with other parts of the human body, such as chowing down on a bit of human liver, turning the patient into a cannibal.

The ancient Greeks also recorded their knowledge of epilepsy, which they referred to as the ‘sacred disease’.  They believed that epilepsy stemmed from a curse delivered by the gods for offending the goddess Selene.  Patients were encouraged to spend a night in the temple of Selene in the hope she would come to you in a dream and advise you on how to remove the curse.

In 400 BC Hippocrates, who is often bestowed with the illustrious title of ‘the father of medicine’, offered another view of epilepsy. He suggested that it was a natural disease and should be treated through natural methods.  He recommended medicines and a controlled diet.  While his methods were hardly scientific by modern standards he was the first to consider epilepsy to be a natural disorder and would be the only one to do so for centuries.

Ancient Greeks and Romans also used castoreum which they extracted from the scent glands of a beaver. You might think this sounds completely nuts but castoreum was actually used well into the 19th century as a sedative and a remedy for convulsions. You could buy it in every apothecary (or chemist to you modern folk).

The human scull was also considered to be an effective remedy for the falling sickness as it was known in eras gone by. But the stories go that if the patient was a man, the scull must be that of a woman, and vice versa.

Then there was mugwort. No, it’s not something you pick up at Hogwarts, although this plant was seen to be a sort of magical medicine that could cure many ailments. Absinth, which is made from mugwort flowers, was also used to treat epilepsy.

The Middle Ages

Fast forward to the Middle Ages where it became pretty difficult for scientists to push back against what the Catholic Church was teaching. At this time, the Church was the most powerful institution in the world and it crushed scientific views that clashed with the Bible’s teachings, labeling those who dared speak against them as blasphemous. This meant, in the West at least, people’s knowledge of epilepsy was dictated by the view of the Catholic Church. When they said seizures were caused by a person being possessed by devil, you had damn well better believe them!  Because epilepsy was seen as a religious problem, the only attempted cures were religious methods.

People turned to several saints for help or prayed to them to negotiate with God on their behalf. And while today doctors prescribe medication, back then the ill were given an exorcist to perform rituals, prayers and use a variety of techniques that often caused physical pain to rid them of the devil.

Aside from dramatic exorcisms, patients were encouraged to pray, fast, offer sacrifices and make pilgrimages, but all this made little difference to those who, as we now know, were suffering from a neurological condition.

Alongside the religious attempts to find a cure, various superstitious methods of treatment also developed. There were spells, witchcraft, fetishism, and the use of amulets.

Treatments that used various plants were also widely used in the Middle Ages. Which plants you ask? Well, pretty much all of them but the most important ones were valerian, peony, mugwort, thorn-apple, common henbane, mistletoe, belladonna, foxglove, bitter orange and Peruvian bark.

For a time, epilepsy was also seen to be a sign of witchcraft and many people were killed because of it. According to the Epilepsy Foundation, the famous book the Malleus Malleficarum makes mention of epilepsy. It served as a guidebook for the Inquisition from the late 1400s right up until the Salem witch trials 1692. Hundreds of thousands of accused witches, mostly women, were killed and at least some of them were charged with causing epilepsy.

When scientists were emancipated by the Renaissance it led to new medical discoveries. This began to change the way epilepsy was viewed and soon it was widely acknowledged to be a natural disease.  However, the true nature of epilepsy was still misunderstood and it was defined as a type of insanity, and a contagious one at that. This resulted in epileptics being placed in mental hospitals away from the other patients.

During the Renaissance, chemical substances such as copper, zinc oxide, silver nitrate, mercury, bismuth and tin were used in epilepsy treatments.

Modern Times

Sadly, the stigma and mistruths surrounding epilepsy meant that in many countries epileptics were sterilized or stopped from having children.

These days, a small percentage of people can be eligible for surgery, and according to Epilepsy Action, about 70 per cent of those who undergo the surgery becoming seizure free.

Modern medicines can also keep epilepsy under control with many patients still able to get a driver’s licence.

Ancient Times

In ancient times, catnip tea became a popular remedy for colicky babies. The herb is thought to help relaxation and many fraught mothers have tried to encourage their babies to drink small amounts.

In the 2^nd century, Greek physician Galen prescribed opium to calm fussy babies. According to a paper reproduced on the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime website, Galen wrote that “opium is the strongest of the drugs which numb the senses and induce a deadening sleep; its effects are produced when it is soaked in boiling water, taken up on a flock of wool and used as a suppository; at the same time some can be spread over the forehead and in the nostrils. If it is mixed with a drug that mitigates its power, its effects are greatly reduced”.

Middle Ages

Since the Middle Ages aniseed tea has been used to ease colic symptoms. Nursing mothers also used to drink the tea to increase their milk production.

But during this era they also tried more sinister things, such as alcohol, to calm a baby. They found that it made a child sleepy and therefore gave the parents or nurses some much-needed respite. Obviously back then they didn’t have all the evidence we now have about the negative side effects of alcohol on children, and especially babies, whose bodies and brains are much less developed and therefore more sensitive to many substances.

Another substance that did more harm than good was opium. In a similar way to alcohol, it was seen to soothe (read drug) an upset baby. Mothers and wet nurses would sometimes smear opium lotions and pastes on their nipples before feeding a baby to get them to calm down.

1700s-1900s

In the late 1700s and early 1800s, Godfrey’s Cordial was one of the most widely used medicines given to infants and children in England and the United States. Cordial sounds harmless enough, right? Wrong! The medicine, which was often prescribed without first consulting a doctor, was used to treat babies for a range of symptoms, including colic. Along with another popular medicine of the time, Dalby’s Carminative, both contained doses of opium. Godfrey’s Cordial contained one grain of opium in every two ounces; Dalby’s Carminative contained one-quarter of a grain of opium in the same amount.

It may seem ridiculous to give a baby opium now, but in the past, opium was sometimes referred to as the ‘gift from God’ which led to a cavalier attitude about the consequences of opium overdose. There was very little knowledge around the problems associated with the drug and there certainly weren’t any stern warnings for parents on the label. It was simply seen as an effective way to calm an upset baby.

As a result, many babies died from opium poisoning in the early 1800s. The problem even made its way into literature. Charlotte Yonge’s novel The Daisy Chain, written in 1856, tells the story of a baby who was killed by an overdose of Godfrey’s Cordial which was doled out by an ignorant nurse.

By the 1900s doctors began trialing sedative medications and the use of ‘gripe water’ gained in popularity. Gripe water is a generic term for liquids that claim to ease gas, digestion and other colicky symptoms. The problem was, while many of these were promoted as herbal remedies they actually contained alcohol or active ingredients such as sodium bicarbonate.

These days, there is no agreement on the most effective way to ease colic in babies, but many herbal remedies are still available. It is unclear how effective they are at easing symptoms and most advice still centres around letting the issue resolve itself naturally while keeping the baby comfortable with soothing music, warm baths, massage or a dummy.

Ancient Times

Historians have uncovered papers from ancient Egypt that show prescriptions written in hieroglyphics for an illness that appears similar to asthma. They detail remedies included mixing herbs together and heating the mixture on bricks so the patient can inhale the fumes. Crushed and sun-dried stramonium leaves and roots were sometimes part of the mix.

Around 2600 BC scholars in China were writing about a respiratory disease that was characterised by noisy breathing. They later prescribed a bitter yellow tea to patients, an ancient remedy made with a herb from the ma huang plant. This medicinal plant wasn’t discovered by the rest of the world for many, many centuries.

Meanwhile, in Central America, the Aztecs were ingesting a plant containing ephedra to clear mucus out of the airways and in South America the Incas were treating asthma with a cocaine-like dried leaf.

Around 400 BC ancient Greek physician Hippocrates figured out the link between the environment and respiratory disease and suggested that different climates and locations could minimize the symptoms. Holiday on the Greek islands anyone?

By 1 AD asthma sufferers would have had to have a pretty strong stomach as many were prescribed dried fox liver or roasted fox lungs. What a delicacy! Massage (a much nicer choice, in my opinion) was also a common option.

Then in Roman times, around 50 AD, a clever man known as Pliny the elder recognised that pollen could cause breathing difficulty and recommended the use of the herb ephedra (which was a forerunner to the drug ephedrine) in red wine as an asthma remedy.  But he also suggested drinking the blood of wild horses so, maybe he wasn’t so clever after all.

By the time Alexander the Great invaded India, asthma sufferers were smoking the herb stramonium to relax their lungs and ease their breathing difficulties.

In ancient times a mix of owl’s blood in wine was also recommended. Yummo!

1700s – 1900s

By 1700, Sir John Floyer was recommending cold baths (you can imagine how popular these would have been in freezing cold England!),  cutting the skin to purge blood and opiates to ease the mind and relax the body. He was also big on herbs that cause vomiting and anything that made you need to wee.  By this time, asthma sufferers were also encouraged to avoid jobs that generated dust and fumes, so too bad if you had dreams of becoming a blacksmith.

In the 1800s, arsenic was a harsh treatment prescribed for respiratory conditions.

At the beginning of the 20th century doctors started seeing asthma as a psychosomatic disease, meaning it was considered a psychological problem, with treatment often involving psychoanalysis and other ‘talking cures’. A child’s wheeze was seen by some as a cry for their mother and some psychoanalysts thought asthma patients should be treated for depression. This theory was eventually disproven and asthma was recognised as a physical condition.

In the 1940s and 50s asthma medicines involved adrenaline injections and aminophylline tablets or suppositories.

In the 1960s it began being treated with anti-inflammatory medication.

Ancient Times

Arthritis has been plaguing mankind since ancient times. There are some references to a condition that seems to be similar to rheumatoid arthritis in the Ebers Papyrus, which was written in ancient Egypt around 1500BC.  Several studies have even found evidence of arthritis in Egyptian mummies.

In ancient Greece, they used extracts from the willow tree’s bark and leaves to help with arthritis pain relief.

In ancient China, acupuncture, acupressure, heat therapies and cupping were all used to help patients with arthritis.

Middle Ages

By the Middle Ages, doctors were more commonly prescribing bloodletting and leeching, and yes, they are both as horrible as they sound. Bloodletting is the draining of blood from a patient in the hope of curing or preventing an illness while leeching is putting live leeches onto the skin to suck blood out of the body.

Why on Earth did they do this? Good question. Ancient philosophers believed the human body was made up of four elements; earth, air, fire and water and four bodily humours; blood, phlegm, yellow bile and black bile. They believed that balancing the humours could have an effect on a person’s health. In order to balance the humours, doctors often advised patients to undergo invasive treatments like bloodletting. But a risky procedure like that could not be carried out at just any old time. No, no, no! Physicians first had to consult the stars. Medieval astrologers believed the movements of the stars influenced many things on Earth, including the inner workings of the human body. In order to monitor their influence, doctors often carried around special calendars and charts to check the position of the stars before beginning a procedure or making a diagnosis.

According to the British Library, by the end of the 1500s, physicians across Europe were required by law to calculate the position of the Moon before carrying out complicated medical procedures, such as surgery or bloodletting.

1800s-1900s

Leeching, however, was not just a medieval practice. Through the 19th century leeching was frequently carried out in Europe, Asia, and America to deplete the body of blood. Today, leeching is only used rarely and to restore blood flow to areas where veins have been damaged, for example after an appendage has been reattached or a tissue grafted. The European medicinal leech is most commonly used.

The medicinal leech is used because its saliva contains substances that anesthetize the bite area, which is why you often can’t feel a leech bite until it has been attached to your skin for quite a while. The leech’s saliva also helps to dilate blood vessels and increase blood flow to the area. This helps blood flow return to damaged veins but it also helps the leeches to increase the size of their lunch. Greedy little suckers!

Researchers are still looking into the effects of leeching in arthritis patients. In 2002 a research trial found positive results from the use of leeches, which was thought to be due to the combination of anaesthetic and anticoagulant released from their bite. However many other scientists disputed this research, saying all it showed was evidence of a very powerful placebo effect as it was impossible to have a control group where ‘fake leeches’ were used.

According to an article published in the British Medical Journal there was also a time when crows meat mixed with spirits was considered a treatment for rheumatism. And you might be surprised to learn where the evidence came from. According to the article, there was a Chinese man living in Victoria, Australia, who used to buy live crows for 50p and mix up the concoction according to an ancient Chinese recipe (which specified the crow’s meat must be fresh). Another unusual treatment the author attributed to Australia was standing in the thorax of a dead stranded whale, which was said to substantially ease arthritic pain. Eventually the cranky residents of one stretch of coastline in New South Wales insisted that the stinky dead animal be removed from their beach and the long-suffering arthritis patients had to search for another method of relief. The article also refers to a Scottish practice of putting earthworms into an airtight tin for two weeks until they released an oil which can be rubbed onto sore joints.

In 1899, aspirin was developed which provided some respite for aching joints. This was followed 50 years later by the advent of paracetamol.

Gold has also been used in medicine throughout recent history and is actually still used in some cases to this day.

According to Arthritis Research UK, gold injections are made from a compound called sodium aurothiomalate, which contains gold. Gold is prescribed to reduce joint inflammation and slow down the disease process that can lead to joint damage in rheumatoid arthritis. Because rheumatoid arthritis and other inflammatory types of arthritis cause the body’s immune system to become overactive and attack its own tissues, drugs such as the gold compound work by slowing down the immune system.

French rheumatologist Jacques Forestier’s study concluded in 1932 that gold “may be regarded as the best chemical for the treatment of rheumatoid arthritis” and this influenced medical opinion for the next several decades.

In the 1930s, gold salts were a popular treatment and in the 1940s doctors were using cortisone.

In the early 20^th century many physicians also came to believe that tuberculosis could be the cause of a host of other chronic illnesses, including arthritis. Since heavy metal therapy was already being used to treat tuberculosis, the natural assumption was that it would also help arthritis patients.

Bismuth, arsenic and copper salts were used to varying degrees of success but they were soon rejected by medical practitioners.

Ancient China/Egypt/Greece

Historians think the earliest account of a disease that resembles leprosy appears in an Egyptian Papyrus document written around 1550 BC.

Indian writings from around 600 BC  also describe a disease that resembles leprosy but it took a bit longer to make its way to Europe where it is believed to have been transported by travelling armies.

It first appeared in ancient Greek records after Alexander the Great’s troops came back from India. The first known Roman reference was around the time Pompey’s army returned from Egypt.

In the past doctors were willing to try all kinds of remedies to cure the disfiguring disease. Those of you with a queasy stomach may want to look away now because one common treatment that reared its head from time to time was the use of blood – both as a beverage (I’d probably prefer a fruit juice myself) and as a (rather unhygienic) bath. And it wasn’t only human blood that was used in leprosy treatments. Documents also describe the use of dogs’ blood, lambs’ blood and even blood drained from dead bodies.

Early doctors also prescribed unusual animal-based treatments including snake venom, bee stings, frog poison and scorpion stings. Scarification, carving or burning the skin to leave scars, was another option, with or without the added pain of irritants such as arsenic. Even (boys look away!) castration had its time as a leprosy treatment.

There are plenty of references to leprosy in ancient Chinese texts, with many harsh social treatments as well as quirky medicinal options prescribed. For example, there’s evidence of leprosy sufferers being forced to divorce and go into exile as well as tales of assassins disguising themselves as leprosy sufferers to get closer to their target. Some people even tried to disguise themselves by painting themselves with Chinese lacquer in order to look like a leper and escape prosecution and death.

But traditional medicine was also believed to help those with leprosy, filled with all kinds of strange ingredients that you definitely can’t pick up from your local corner store. Sharp acupuncture needles were often administered and by the time the Tang Dynasty rolled around in 618, the disease was so concerning to authorities that they appointed an official-in-charge of leprosy. The herb chaulmoogra was also used after it was introduced to China, likely by Indian Buddhist monks.

Middle Ages

In Europe during the Middle Ages there was a huge stigma associated with leprosy and sufferers were forced to wear special clothing, ring bells to warn others that they were close, and even walk on a particular side of the street, depending on the wind direction.

The first known leper hospital was set up in England in the 7^th century but by the 15^th century it was endemic in Europe, due in part to the travelling armies of the Crusades.

Leprosy came to be known as the ‘living death’, and often its victims were treated as if they had already died. Funeral services were held to declare those living with the disease were dead to society and relatives were even allowed to claim their inheritance before they died. During this period, leprosy, like many diseases, was considered to be divine punishment from God for a person’s sins. Patients had to sit in separate seats in churches, use separate holy-water, and in some cases they had to stay outside and watch through a hole in the wall, the ultimate social exclusion of the era.

1800s

Almost every type of drug was used in the 1800s to try and cure leprosy.
These include potassium iodide, arsenic, antimony, copper, sera, vaccines and aniline dyes.

Thymol, strychnine, various kinds of baths, X-rays, radium and electrical currents were also used, which continued into the next century.

New leper colonies also popped up throughout the 1800s and 1900s. Patients were removed from their families and lived in isolation with other leprosy sufferers. One of the most famous leper colonies was Kalaupapa, on the Hawaiian island of Moloka’i which was blocked by cliffs on one side and the vast Pacific Ocean on the other.

Chamoogra oil was introduced into Western medicine by British physician Frederic John Mouat in 1854 but as you’ll remember, it had been used in Asia to help leprosy and various skin conditions for many hundreds of years.

This meant doctors all over the world were now using the plant in treatments, many by injecting patients with oil from the chaulmoogra nut, which was a very painful process.

In 1873 there was a breakthrough in leprosy research and Norwegian Dr Gerhard Henrik Armauer Hansen finally identified the germ that causes it. This proved the disease was not hereditary, a curse, or caused by sin but even after this scientific breakthrough, leprosy patients were still stigmatised and shunned.

In 1941 the drug promin was introduced as a treatment for leprosy. While the treatment was successful, it required many painful injections but the treatment has since been refined.

Ancient Times

The earliest known record of wound treatment was found on clay tablets from Mesopotamia from about 2500 BC. They used trial and error to find ways to treat wounds, which included washing them with milk or water before dressing them with honey or resin.

In ancient Egypt the common treatments had more of a spiritual basis and open wounds were seen as possible entry points for bad spirits. They needed some kind of repellent to act as a guard against evil entering the body and so they smeared donkey poo onto the wound to keep the body safe and secure. Although it was disgusting, this treatment is actually thought to have contained some antibiotic properties that may have helped healing.   Adhesive tape and gauze bandaging was also used to close a cleanly cut wound. Other wounds were left open and then covered with fresh meat on the first day then slathered with herbs and honey. Sounds more like a barbecue marinade than a medical intervention!

But here’s one that’s a lot less appetizing; mouldy bread was also used as an antibiotic to care for wounds.

In ancient Greece, around 400BC, Hippocrates was promoting wine and vinegar as the best liquids for washing out wounds. He also suggested treating a wound with honey and oil after it had been cleaned.  Wool boiled in water or wine was seen as an appropriate bandage.

In Homer’s poem The Iliad, which was written around 700 BC and based on events from the Trojan War half a millennium earlier, he wrote about a surgeon who pulled an arrow head from a soldier and sucked blood from the wound to remove any poison before applying a salve.

In ancient Rome, Pliny the Elder recommended fresh urine for the treatment of “sores, burns, affections of the anus, chaps and scorpion stings”.

Traditional Chinese medicine advocated the use of bronze instruments, green tea, liquorice, soaked mushrooms, anaesthetics and other herbal powders to encourage healing and help prevent infection. Both gauze and silk were used to bandage up wounds and acupuncture was a popular treatment.

Middle Ages

By the time the Middle Ages rolled around surgery was becoming a more refined art, although it was still a long way from the kind of sterile, controlled environment we have in hospitals today. Historic drawings from the era show surgeons could be called in to treat a skull fracture. Archaeologists have even found medieval skulls where the bone has been knitted together after a surgical treatment, showing that to a degree, it worked.

Following along the same path as the donkey poo used in ancient times, human urine became a popular method of cleansing wounds in the middle ages. According to a Guardian report, in 1550 the Italian doctor Leonardo Fioravanti saw a man’s nose sliced off in an argument so he urinated on it before stitching it back on. Henry VIII’s surgeon Thomas Vicary recommended all battle wounds should be washed in urine while others advised the same for ulcers, poisonous bites and stings. Back then urine was considered a safer alternative to the water sources that were typically available because it was sterile when it left the body.

In the 16^th century, gunshot wounds were treated by pouring boiling hot oil into the wound to get rid of any gunpowder. Because they didn’t know about bacteria, doctors from that era thought any infection was the result of poison from the gunpowder.

During the siege of Turin in 1536, French Army surgeon Ambroise Paré ran out of boiling oil so he used egg yolk, rose oil and turpentine to flush the wound instead.  To his surprise it actually worked and he noted reduced inflammation compared to boiling oil and much better patient comfort.

But perhaps Paré’s most important discovery was that you didn’t have to apply a red-hot iron to a flesh wound to seal it. Instead he suggested tying off veins and arteries which made thigh amputations possible. He published his technique in 1564, imploring surgeons to ditch “the old and cruel way of healing”. With this development, limb amputations became the most common method for treating complex extremity wounds.

1700s-Today

During the American Revolutionary War, surgeons took to only removing bullets that were within easy reach. When they were removed, a piece of onion was placed inside the wound, which was then closed and reopened in one to two days. Imagine that sweet smell!

Speaking of disgusting, maggots have also formed part of wound management practices across different cultures for thousands of years. This continued into the 1800s when Napoleon’s chief surgeon noted that maggot infestation appeared to prevent infection and accelerate the healing of battle injuries.

In the American Civil War physicians deliberately introduced maggots into wounds to clean out even the most gangrenous wounds. They said it reduced the chance of developing septicemia and sped up recovery.

World War II triggered many medical advances including the development of the first alternative to gauze. Sterilised cellophane packaging from blood transfusion equipment was used to dress burn wounds which led to improved healing rates and less pain for victims.

The war also saw the widespread use of the precursor to the band-aid; plastic films combined with cotton-lint pads. Polyamide film was also trialled, and though it was found to speed up the healing process, it was expensive, rigid and difficult to coat with adhesive.

More recently, spray-on dressings have provided an alternative for areas which are difficult to apply a traditional dressing to, such as the face, scrotum and abdomen.

By the mid-1930s, maggot therapy – which had been practiced for thousands of years – had become part of mainstream medicine in the United States. But within a decade, it was replaced by penicillin and other new drugs, as well as better surgical techniques. However, it did continue to be used in specific circumstances, which prompted the US Food and Drug Administration to approve the domestic marketing of medical maggots – and medical leeches – in 2004. The FDA recognised the efficacy of maggots because they provided a gentle and extremely efficient way to clean chronic wounds.

1800s

While alcohol has been consumed by Western civilisation since colonial times, it wasn’t until the 1800s that alcohol consumption reached its peak, becoming widely accessible and affordable for the general population. This was when the damaging effects of alcohol abuse began taking their toll on society and families.

Early treatments for alcohol addiction usually involved isolating the patient from society to remove the temptation of alcohol (typically in hospitals or institutions focused on providing medical treatment for alcohol addiction), and then detoxification, which came in a number of different forms. Morphine, for one. Some doctors at the time believed that alcoholics were incurable and that their best hope was to transfer their dependence to morphine – thought to be a less damaging addiction socially, physically and economically.

The Keeley cure, another famous treatment in the late 1800s, had patients stay in a treatment centre for 31 days while receiving daily injections and oral medication. These injections and tonics were said to be made of double chloride of gold, but in reality, were a dangerous concoction of coca, morphine, arsenic and strychnine that caused a myriad of side effects ranging from insanity to death.

1900s

The 20^th century saw the introduction of more bizarre, experimental addiction treatments and therapies. Based on the theory that addicts built up antibodies to alcohol, a “vaccine for alcoholism” was developed by giving alcohol to horses until they became dependent on it, and then injecting their blood into other horses. The scientists working on the vaccine claimed that the second group of horses, after being given the vaccine, would not drink alcohol, which led to attempts to isolate antibodies from the horse blood and apply them to the cut skin of alcoholics to “vaccinate” them against further alcoholism.

Needless to say, this treatment was ineffective. Other attempts at cures included dosing patients with hallucinogens like LSD and psilocybin (magic mushrooms), and aversion therapy – which is still used today. In the late 1900s, however, the method used to create an aversion to alcohol was for patients to drink their favourite alcoholic drink slowly in a room full of mirrors, to focus their attention on the beverage. Doctors then administered electric shocks or emetics to induce vomiting, sometimes even going so far as to add rotted sea grapes, mole blood, sparrow dung or live eels to the drink.

Alcoholics were also pressured into sterilisation or forbidden from marrying in an attempt to prevent them from having children and “passing down” their addictive behaviour, which was believed to not only be a genetic problem but to also get more severe with each generation.

1300s

Anxiety, like most types of mental illness, has had a history rooted in misunderstanding and misinformed treatments. During the early Renaissance, anxiety was often interchanged with “hysteria” and thought to only affect women, who were more prone to acting in a highly anxious, high-strung manner.

Naturally, these women were often accused of being witches, in the same way that almost every unexplained condition in these early days was linked to the supernatural. If they were vocal about their anxiety or had physical symptoms that doctors couldn’t explain any other way, they were assumed to be witches and were “treated” with torture, execution or burning at the stake – none of which even came close to curing the problem at hand.

Ironically, many women were concerned about their friends or neighbours being witches and as a result, became stressed out and anxious themselves, sometimes even incriminating themselves in the process.

1700-1800s

In the Victorian era, anxious or hysterical women were seen as crazy. Many women who had persistent panic attacks were sent to insane asylums where they were treated with electroshock therapy and lobotomies which, more often than not, only resulted in turning the patient into a zombie, if not killing them completely.

Towards the late 1800s, attitudes towards anxiety began to shift as more men were recognised as having similar difficulties. Soldiers in the American Civil War started showing symptoms of what we now know as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), including heart palpitations and shortness of breath, and the condition was referred to as “nerve weakness”.

Opium was a popular treatment for anxiety-related conditions, before its addictive properties were well understood, as well as ethyl alcohol and bromide salts. While there were great steps being taken in this early period towards properly understanding anxiety, treatments at the time were unfortunately focused on offering short-term solutions that ultimately just made the problem worse.

1900s

The early 19^th century was when people first started catching on to the fact that anxiety had a psychological nature to it, and Russia even began sending psychiatrists off to war together with soldiers to treat them after battle.

Unfortunately, at the same time, it was also thought that people with anxiety or other mental illnesses should be sterilised to prevent their condition from being passed down to children. Treatments around this time included sedation with barbiturates, muscular relaxation techniques and electroshock therapy. Fear exposure therapy was also introduced in 1950, which involved repeatedly exposing patients to their fear trigger in order to make them desensitised.

This was a popular technique for a couple of decades until anti-depressants were discovered to successfully treat anxiety as well as depression. The term ‘anxiety disorder’ was coined in the 1980s, and in 1990, it was confirmed that patients with anxiety had reduced numbers of the neurotransmitters responsible for bringing the “happy chemicals” dopamine and serotonin to the brain, thus making anti-depressant-type drugs effective.

800 BC

While the earliest known record of diabetes dates back to 15^th century BC Egypt, no one had any idea how to treat or cure it for thousands of years. It wasn’t until 800 BC that physicians made the connection between the illness, sugar and frequent urination – notably, the high levels of sugar in the urine of individuals with diabetes.

At the time (and for many years after, well up to the 11^th century), the only way to diagnose diabetes was with ‘water tasters’ – people who drank the urine of those suspected to have the condition, to see if it tasted sweet. Not a highly sought-after job, we’d imagine! It was much, much later – the 1800s, in fact – that scientists finally developed chemical tests to do the job of detecting sugar in urine.

The earliest treatments for diabetes involved prescribed exercise. Greek physicians in 800 BC recommended horseback riding in particular, which was believed to alleviate excess urination. Other forms of therapy included drinking wine and overfeeding, to compensate for the loss of so much fluid weight.

1700-1800s

The next major breakthrough in diabetes treatment came in the 1700s. The first distinction between Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes was made in 1776, and it was discovered that excess sugar was also found in patients’ blood as well as their urine.

Enter the first round of dietary approaches to managing the condition. Some were successful – one example was a high fat and protein diet, based on the observation that sugar in the urine increased after eating starchy food – and some weren’t so much. Patients were advised to do things like eat extra large quantities of sugar or eat only the fat and meat of animals, which wouldn’t be the last of the bizarre and impractical treatment advice.

It was around this time, in the early 1870s during the Franco-Prussian war, that French physicians noticed improved symptoms in diabetes patients who were on war-related food rations. This led to the idea of individualised diets as treatments, but then soon became the phase of unhelpful fad diets throughout the next century.

1900s

The early 1900s saw the rise of fad diet treatments. Think “potato therapy”, the “rice cure”, the “milk diet” and the “oat cure”, a diet of 8 ounces of oatmeal mixed with 8 ounces of butter eaten every 2 hours. In some cases, opium was even recommended!

This was also when the “starvation diet” became popular. Leading diabetes specialists in the United States promoted a fasting diet, based on the belief that a diabetic’s body cannot use food, and the idea was soon widely adopted around the world. Patients were admitted to hospital and basically starved, given only black coffee mixed with whisky every 2 hours between 7 am and 7 pm. When there was no trace of sugar left in the urine, usually after around 5 days, patients were then put on a strict diet and exercise.

While extremely drastic and dangerous, the treatment did successfully help many patients with Type 2 diabetes. However, most patients with Type 1 diabetes died during treatment, most likely from starvation. This severe fasting and undernutrition was one of the most commonly used diabetes treatments until the eventual discovery of insulin in 1921.

5000 BC

Still largely misunderstood even today, mental illness has always been an area of medical fascination, exploration and experimentation. Attempts to treat mental illness go as far back as the Neolithic era, with the discovery of trephined skulls. Trephining (or trepanning) was the process of chipping a hole into the skull with stone instruments, in an attempt to release the evil spirits believed to be living in the sufferers’ heads and cure them.

Interestingly, some of those who underwent this procedure actually survived and lived for many years, with their skulls showing signs of healing. It’s thought that in some cases, trephining may even have relieved pressure on the brain, helping to ease their discomfort.

This procedure was used for centuries to treat mental illness (as well as skull fractures and migraines) and the only thing that really advanced over this period was the tools they used, as they gradually moved from crude stone devices to sophisticated skull saws and drills designed specifically for this purpose.

Middle Ages

Ideas on how to treat mental illness changed dramatically over this period. It was initially believed to be a result of supernatural phenomena – most commonly demonic possession – and as a result was treated with religious rituals like exorcisms, incantations, prayer and atonement. Sometimes more human methods were also applied in an attempt to drive out the evil spirits including threats, bribery, punishment and submission.

But with new advancements by early European thinkers, the belief that mental illness stemmed from supernatural forces was altered to suggest that it was actually caused by natural occurrences in the human body. Enter the concept of the four essential fluids, or humours, of the human body: blood, phlegm, bile and black bile. It was thought that these humours, and the combinations of them, were what made everyone’s unique personalities.

After this discovery, mental illness was believed to be caused by an imbalance of these humours, and patients were purged in an attempt to bring the body back into balance. Treatments included severe laxatives, emetics to induce vomiting and bloodletting using leeches or cupping.

1500-mid 1800s

The 14^th and 15^th century saw the mass establishment of mental asylums and facilities specifically for mental health, and many of those with psychological disorders were left to these places because their families didn’t know how to care for them.

Many of these asylums were extremely inhumane in their treatment of patients, not aimed at helping them overcome their illness but rather sentencing them to a life of abuse and abandonment so as not to be a burden on their families or a disturbance to the community. Patients were shackled to the walls in dark, cramped, dirty cells, permitted only enough movement to feed themselves but not to lie down at night, fed very poorly and left to stand in their own waste.

Treatments were attempted, but they were based on the belief that the patient simply needed to choose rationality over insanity or that their mind just needed to be shocked back to its normal state. These cruel, radical attempts at cures included dousing the patient in either hot or ice-cold water, intimidation, blistering, physical restraints, threats and straitjackets.

Late 1800s-1900s

This period saw major developments in psychopathology and the growth of psychoanalysis as therapy. But at the same time and equally as widespread was the use of somatic treatments designed to correct chemical imbalances in the brain such as electroconvulsive therapy (triggering a seizure by passing small electric currents through the brain) and insulin-shock treatment (injecting large doses of insulin to induce a coma).

Despite the good intentions behind these treatments, they were used to abuse patients in mental asylums – particularly electroconvulsive therapy (ECT), which was used to intimidate, control and punish. Some patients were even forced to undergo this frightening treatment more than a hundred times.

When ECT wasn’t effective, more drastic treatments were forced upon them such as psychosurgery and lobotomies (surgical operations to sever nerves in the brain). Even with their 25% death rate, these procedures remained popular for almost 20 years until the introduction of psychoactive drugs.

1700-1800s

In 18^th century England, one of the most common remedies for a cough or sore throat was snail juice. Doctors would recommend boiling snails in barley water or making them into a syrup and drinking it until the sore throat was cured.

Said to have had no taste, the slimy juice was especially advised for children and those with tender constitutions. To make a syrup of snails, patients were instructed to take one pound of garden snails, early in the morning while dew was still on them, take off their shells, slit them and put them in a bag with half a pound of sugar. They would then hang the bag in a cellar and the syrup would melt and drop through.

The other option was to boil 2 or 3 snails in a serving of barley water, or 6 or 8 in a quart of water for a larger serving, adding a spoonful to every drink. A fresh batch needed to be made every 2 or 3 days to stop it from becoming too thick. It was also advised not to tell the patient they were drinking snail juice (for obvious reasons), but to just give it to them mixed in with their regular drink.

Late 1800s-1900s

From snails, the next widely marketed cough suppressant was – believe it or not – heroin. At the end of the 19^th century, German drug company Bayer (most famously known for commercialising Aspirin just a few years later) introduced heroin cough syrup and, even more amazingly, marketed it towards children with ads showing kids reaching for the bottle or being spoon-fed by their parents.

At the time, heroin was believed to be a non-addictive alternative to other cough syrups containing opiates. Patients could buy it over the counter to treat sore throats, coughs and cold symptoms, and overdoses weren’t unusual. Some mothers who gave the drug to their babies even accidentally killed them by giving them too much.

Eventually, as patients started developing a much higher tolerance for the drug and pharmacies were getting packed out with patients trying to get their hands on more, people started catching on to the fact that using heroin to treat coughs was leading to a wider addiction problem. In the US, heroin was restricted to prescription-only use in 1914 and finally banned altogether by the FDA in 1924.

1600-1800

Acne has been a curse on young and old throughout the ages and, not surprisingly, the target for countless quick-fix cures and wild, wacky treatments promising clearer, healthier skin. Wind back to the 17^th century and you’ll never guess what the widely used, go-to acne cure and cleanser was: urine!

It was recommended to take a little urine (preferably your first of the day) on a washcloth and pat it on the acne-affected area. Baby’s urine was thought to be especially healing, so if there was a wet diaper around, even better. Many people at the time praised the wondrous effects of urine on the skin, claiming that it really did treat acne and made their skin smoother.

And to be fair, this remedy is actually still used today by those who have a strong enough stomach – it’s called urotherapy, and it’s based on the claim that urine has healing minerals and nutrients in it that your body will benefit from. It does make you wonder though; what was going through the head of the first person to give it a go?

Late 1800s

1890s America saw the rise of more misguided cure-all acne treatments, most notably (and dangerously) being arsenic tablets. While we now know the dangers of arsenic in its ability to overproduce keratin, creating a build-up of skin cells lodged in your pores as well as other skin deformities, at the time it was touted as a popular and effective acne cure.

Luckily, the recommended dosage wasn’t usually strong enough to do any real harm. Patients were generally advised to take a pill of one hundredth of a gram of arsenic sulphide (which is also less toxic than other forms of arsenic) every two hours. This equalled approximately .004 grams of arsenic sulphide per day – not in any way ideal, but at least not potent enough to do any damage.

Other treatments making the rounds at this time included sour milk and watermelon juice face washes – both much more appealing options!

1900s

From the early 1930s, ultraviolet radiation therapy and röntgenotherapy (x-ray therapy) were commonly used to treat acne and other skin conditions like eczema. Both forms of therapy used the power of radiation in a controlled environment to kill acne, gradually increasing the level of exposure to get a reaction as quickly as possible.

Even though there had not been much research into or testing of these types of therapies, and scepticism about its safety and benefits was growing, they continued to be widely used to treat acne, other skin disorders and medical conditions right up until the 1960s.

It wasn’t until the long-term health of patients was affected, with some treatment groups being found with thyroid cancer and epithelioma, that the medical world finally started looking at it more closely. There’s at least one thing we know for certain will never change – people really will try anything for the sake of beauty!

1800s

Dieting has been around since the Ancient Greeks and Romans. But while it was mostly about health back then, it was the 19^th century when the idea of fad diets really took off as people got more obsessed with aesthetics, celebrities and being thinner.

The first of the big celebrity diets was popularised by Lord Byron in the early 1800s. The poet credited his fashionably thin and pale look to a diet of vinegar and water, drinking it throughout the day and eating potatoes soaked in it to saturate his body with the stuff. An obsessive dieter, Byron was fixated on cleansing and purging his body and embraced the side effects of frequent vomiting and diarrhoea that came with the diet.

In the mid-1800s came rubber underwear and arsenic pills. Rubber was thought to hold in fat and cause sweating, leading to weight loss (while also breaking down the skin with over-exposure to moisture, frequently causing infection). Both men and women faithfully wore the uncomfortable garments right up until World War 1, when rubber became necessary for the war effort.

Enter the phase of dangerous diet drugs, pills and potions. Many of these “miracle cures” contained arsenic and strychnine – relatively small doses, but many dieters would take more than the recommended dose thinking it would help them lose more weight, often resulting in arsenic poisoning.

1900s

Dieting and weight loss became a very profitable business over the next century, and advertising for diet products was much more sophisticated. This was the era of the tapeworm diet – a hugely risky process that involved swallowing beef tapeworm cysts, usually in the form of a pill, and letting them reach maturity in the intestines to absorb food and fast-track weight loss.

Once the dieter reached their desired weight, they took an anti-parasitic pill which was meant to kill off the tapeworm, to then be excreted. Not only could this cause serious abdominal and rectal complications, but the growth of the tapeworm couldn’t be controlled with some getting up to 9 metres long. They were also known to cause illnesses like headaches, meningitis, eye problems, dementia and epilepsy.

Other popular weight loss cures around this time included smoking (popularised by the cigarette brand Lucky Strike and their “Reach for a Lucky instead of a sweet” ad campaign, pushing the appetite-suppressing powers of nicotine), the Sleeping Beauty diet (sedation for days at a time to stop eating and sleep off the weight, rumoured to have been used by Elvis) and slimming soap (a “magic” solution to slim down by lathering up – later shown to be nothing more than normal hand soap made with potassium chloride and a few other useless ingredients).

400 BC

For most of human history, fevers have been a perplexing medical condition rooted in an exaggerated fear of what it can mean. While relatively common, having an unusually high body temperature was concerning because there was no theoretical understanding of infectious diseases and how the body fights them, which made their potential for danger a lot scarier than the actual threat they posed.

In the 4^th century BC, Greek philosopher and physician Aristotle held that illnesses were caused by nutritional excesses and deficiencies. He believed that food to the body was like wood to a fireplace and that the more you ate, the higher your temperature would rise.

Fever sufferers, then, were advised to gorge themselves. Aristotle believed that over-eating would heat up the body so much that it would burn out the fever, in the same way that a burning forest overpowers a campfire. Western doctors caught on to this remedy as well, and it remained the standard medical advice to treat fevers for many centuries.

Middle Ages

By the Middle Ages, fevers had been linked to the supernatural (in the same way that practically every other unexplained illness was). The nature of a fever was widely held to be unnatural and not an extension of a person’s body heat, but rather, something unearthly that was ignited in the heart and then spread through the veins and arteries to engulf the whole body.

The mystery and mysticism surrounding fevers were largely due to the fact that people didn’t understand that they were a symptom and not a disease, and that they seemed to be a paradox. Patients felt hot to the touch while they were shivering cold, and intense fevers could suddenly pass on their own while a person with a mild fever could rapidly get much worse.

As a result, fever treatments around this time were centred on ridding the body of supernatural forces. Incantations, elixirs, charms and exorcisms were all commonly used in an attempt to expel the evil from the patient’s body and return their temperature to normal.

1500-1800s

With gluttony and demonic forces ruled out, the 1500s saw a change in direction in the way fevers were treated – this time, with fasting. It was thought that by depriving the body of food, the internal fire would be cooled. This remedy was used for centuries, well into the late 1800s, and physicians at the time were confident that the “fasting-cure” when applied together with appropriate water and air baths, sunshine and ventilation, would run out a fever within 10 days.

Unfortunately, this method often resulted in patients starving to death when they most likely would have recovered, had they been getting proper nourishment.

Other questionable fever remedies were also advised around this time, including bloodletting and swallowing castor oil to induce vomiting. These were based on the medieval theory of the four body fluids, or humours, and the idea that good health depended on the balance of these humours.

1200-1400s

The earliest cures for erectile dysfunction involved using parts of animals that were associated with potency. From as far back as Ancient Greece and Rome right up until the 13^th century, consuming the genitalia of certain animals (roosters, goats and wolves) was believed to remedy the problem. In the same vein, the meat of snakes (believed to regenerate themselves) and sparrows (known for frenzied copulation) were also eaten in an attempt to rekindle sexual desire.

In the 1400s, the idea began to spread that witches were to blame (as they were for just about everything else). Newlywed men were warned that a witch could steal their penis, cursing them with impotence and making them unable to consummate their marriage, causing disharmony in God’s holy union.

The early church allowed for the annulment of a marriage on the grounds of “magical impotence”, but the witch responsible would – of course – have to be executed. Hundreds of “witches” were burnt at the stake in an effort to return stolen penises to their owners.

1700-1800s

The next round of popular impotence cures were just as painful as they were bizarre. With the rise of electrical experimentation came electrotherapy to increase blood flow through the penis and counter flaccidity, in the form of electro-medical instruments like electric belts and beds. Or, for the more courageous (read: desperate), an electric rod that was inserted into the urethra for internal stimulation.

In France, flagellation was used. Doctors would take a small cat o’ nine tails whip and lightly whip the patient’s penis to cause an influx of blood to the area. Official instructions were to apply the flagellator to the whole length of the penis, pubes, perineum and the inside of the thighs until the skin was red and sore.

Testosterone treatments also began gaining in popularity, and the 1800s saw injections of sheep testis extract as a source of testosterone to cure erectile dysfunction. This treatment was standard until the 1940s when testosterone was purified.

1900s

The first half of the 20^th century was another big period for animal parts – but this time, the surgical grafting of them. Monkey testicle grafts kicked it off, where a thin piece of chimpanzee testicle was grafted onto that of an impotent man. The man’s body rejected the foreign object, but the scar it left behind led everyone to believe it was successful. Consequently, the early 1900s saw thousands of men undergo the procedure until it was finally discredited – but not before a short-lived movement of transplanting tissue from various animals into patients, including deer, goats and boars.

Thankfully, animal tissue transplants soon made way for more modern erectile dysfunction treatments – most of which, in some form, are still being used today. There were vacuum pumps to force blood into the penis, penile injections of the drug papaverine to cause instant erections and inflatable penile implants which were surgically implanted and controlled by the wearer.

Then, in 1989, the drug sildenafil was discovered (more commonly known as Viagra). It was made available to the public in pill form in 1998 – and the rest is history!

Middle Ages

For as long as there have been periods, there has been period pain. Throughout the ages, menstruation and menstrual cramps (also known as dysmenorrhea) have always been a part of life that simply had to be dealt with – sometimes in some very strange ways.

In medieval Europe, periods were viewed as a good thing as they were thought to flush the body of impurities (in the same way as bloodletting, a very popular medical treatment at the time). Menstruating women were self-conscious though, and went to great lengths to conceal the smell by carrying around nutmegs, nosegays and other sweet-smelling flowers.

And if they had painful periods? The common medical advice at the time was to find a toad, burn it in a pot and put the ashes in a pouch. They then wore the pouch around their waist, strapped close to the offending regions. This was believed to help the body with its process of flushing out impurities (in this case, the menstrual blood) and in turn, alleviate cramps.

En un lugar de la Mancha, de cuyo nombre no quiero acordarme, no ha mucho tiempo que vivía un hidalgo de los de lanza en astillero, adarga antigua, rocín flaco y galgo corredor. Una olla de algo más vaca que carnero, salpicón las más noches, duelos y quebrantos los sábados, lantejas los viernes, algún palomino de añadidura los domingos, consumían las tres partes de su hacienda.

El resto della concluían sayo de velarte, calzas de velludo para las fiestas, con sus pantuflos de lo mesmo, y los días de entresemana se honraba con su vellorí de lo más fino. Tenía en su casa una ama que pasaba de los cuarenta, y una sobrina que no llegaba a los veinte, y un mozo de campo y plaza, que así ensillaba el rocín como tomaba la podadera. Frisaba la edad de nuestro hidalgo con los cincuenta años; era de complexión recia, seco de carnes, enjuto de rostro, gran madrugador y amigo de la caza.

1800s

In the Victorian era, before reliable medicines became widely available, women resorted to all sorts of drastic measures to treat menstrual cramps. Balms containing sulphuric acid and turpentine were used, as well as opium, in an attempt to dull the pain.

When brought to the attention of doctors and physicians, it was often treated quite aggressively because of the debilitating symptoms – including some very serious episodes of fainting, vomiting and even convulsions. As a result, one of the more extreme treatments offered in the late 1800s was the surgical removal of the ovaries – thought to be the only real way to put a stop to menstrual pain for good.

Around this time, the sister herbs black haw and black cohosh were discovered to act as natural muscle relaxants, reducing the rate of uterine spasms as well as the overall pain felt. They were used in several best-selling patent medicines circulating at the time, in combination with various other ingredients such as liquorice, chamomile and alcohol, and are still being used today in various forms as herbal remedies.

1400-1600s

Sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s) have been a danger to military service members all throughout history, responsible for millions of disabilities and absences from duty. When syphilis first reared its ugly head in 1495 among the French troops invading Naples in the first of the Italian Wars, it was no different.

Believed to have been brought from America and the New World to the Old World by Christopher Columbus, syphilis had a variety of names at the time – usually based on an enemy or a country people believed responsible for it. To the French, it was the “Neapolitan disease”, the “disease of Naples” or the “Spanish disease”. The English and Italians called it the “French disease” or the “French pox”, the Germans called it the “French evil”, the Russians called it the “Polish disease”, the Polish and Persians called it the “Turkish disease”, the Turkish called it the “Christian disease”, and so on.

There were no effective early treatments for syphilis, although mercury was commonly recommended as a remedy. It was administered in a number of different ways including rubbing it on the skin, applying a plaster, ingesting it, and vaporising it over a fire and exposing the patient to the steam. The goal was to get the patient to salivate which was thought to flush out the disease, but these treatments were extremely painful, led to unpleasant side effects such as gum ulcers and loose teeth, and in some severe cases, even death from mercury poisoning.

1900s

By the early 20^th century, syphilis was better understood but treatments still ranged in effectiveness. Small doses of mercury were still used to some extent, usually mixed into a drug together with other compounds or natural ingredients like sarsaparilla root. Metals like tellurium, vanadium, platinum and gold were also experimented with.

Arsenic in a variety of forms was used as well, which was considerably less toxic than mercury but still not 100% effective and in some cases, unpredictably lethal.

For a brief time, after it was observed that some patients who developed high fevers were cured of syphilis, fever therapy was used by injecting patients with malaria (as it produced prolonged fevers at a high enough temperature to kill syphilis-causing bacteria). This was considered to be an acceptable risk because the malaria could then be treated with quinine, and the treatment was used right up until 1943 when penicillin was introduced and became widely available.

1200-1300s

This once-common medical diagnosis was reserved exclusively for women, with documented complaints dating back to the 13^th century. Grounded in the belief that women did not experience sexual desire or pleasure, their complaints of anxiety, faintness, irritability, sleeplessness, nervousness, erotic fantasies, feelings of heaviness in the lower abdomen and wetness between the legs were written off as an ailment called “hysteria”.

While it’s now easily recognisable as sexual frustration and no longer acknowledged as a medical disorder, at the time it caused a lot of perplexity and misunderstanding for both physicians and patients.

In these early days, doctors did understand that women had libidos and highly advised marriage. But for unmarried women, widows or the religious, it was recommended that they relieve their sexual frustration with dildos, pelvic massages (code for masturbation), fragrant salves or suppositories that really just irritated more than helped.

1500-1700s

By the 16^th and 17^th century, dildos and masturbation had been widely demonised as self-abuse and were much less of an option. Instead, physicians told married women to encourage their husbands’ lust and for single women to try horseback riding which, for some, did provide enough clitoral stimulation to bring about orgasm.

At this time, a woman’s orgasm wasn’t recognised for what it was (because, as everyone knew, women didn’t have sexual feelings and couldn’t possibly experience climax). They were called “paroxysms” and were simply the sudden, intense relief from hysteria.

Physicians’ recommendations to trigger paroxysms were largely unsuccessful, most likely due to the fact that 75% of women need direct clitoral stimulation to orgasm rather than just intercourse. And horseback riding, the only other acceptable option, didn’t provide much relief. But luckily, a more reliable – and socially acceptable – treatment option was beginning to be explored.

1800s

From the late 17^th century and well into the 18^th and early 19^th century, physician-assisted paroxysm was the most widely used treatment for hysteria. This involved doctors or midwives applying vegetable oil to the women’s genitals and then massaging them with one or two fingers inside, and the heel of the hand pressing against the clitoris.

This, obviously, led to orgasm and instant relief from hysteria, making it very popular with a lot of women who were eager to return for further treatments. Unfortunately, all those massages soon led to aching, cramped fingers and hands, and doctors found it difficult to keep administering the treatment to its successful end. They experimented with mechanical substitutes but these were just awkward, unreliable and in some cases, even dangerous.

Then, in 1880, a pioneering English physician invented the first electromechanical vibrator and the idea immediately took off. Cleverly disguised as “personal massagers”, vibrators were sold commercially to trigger paroxysm safely, reliably and as often as desired – taking doctors out of the equation completely as women began to treat their hysteria at home.